That Thing About Being Mixed

I have to admit, I have never thought much about the identity of those who are biracial.  While it is true that all African-Americans are mixed with “something,” most of us simply identify as Black.  This is easy to do when whatever we are mixed with is not obvious or apparent.  However, there are times where matters of identification are not so simple.

One thing that I have noticed when it comes to biracial people is that they are sometimes pushed into “choosing” a side.   Will you have more black friends?  Who will you date?  What area of the cafeteria will you sit in?  What family members will you relate to the most?  How will you dress and wear you hair?  Interestingly enough, the lives of mixed people point out the large issues we have with race relations, social construct, and cultural identity.

That thing about identity

Studies have shown that mixed race people are at great risk for suffering from identity issues as children. This is especially true if the individual is mixed with races of two very different cultures.  Children begin to notice at a young age that they have a physical appearance that is different from others around them.  This realization leads to confusion, questioning, and at times, anxiety.

That thing about picking a side

Even as children, we all want to belong.  Rather it’s a certain club or a particular team, everyone wants to fit in somewhere.  The same is true as we grow older. All of us are looking for a place to fit.   This ultimately leads to individuals “picking a side.”  Even more disheartening are the feelings of not belonging, hurtful comments, the embarrassing “what are you”  lines of questioning, and isolation by those who unable to  place you.

That thing about  culture  

As an African American woman, I may never fully relate to issues that mixed people experience.  Yet, I am fully aware of the things that I take for granted.  Such as the ability to check a box for my race.  The fact that I am never questioned about who or what I am.  The ease at which I am able to relate to other black people without being questioned or ridiculed.  For mixed people, this is not always an easy choice. Many mixed individuals are not able to immerse themselves into both of their cultures.  This destroys the opportunity for one to become a well-rounded and culturally diverse individual.  That is the thing about being mixed. Despite the diverse person that you are, without proper guidance, that diversity is never fully realized.

The struggle between not being Black enough, White enough, Asian enough, Latina enough, or even mixed enough,  are issues that plague the lives of biracial individuals daily.   It is true that we are all mixed with something.  However, to the world, perception is a reality.  If you are perceived to be Black, you are Black.  If you are perceived to be White, you are White.  If you are perceived to be something that does not fit into a neat category… are questioned.  That’s the thing.  That’s the thing about being mixed.

Written by: Michaela Phelps, Staff writer, #mygirlsquad


2 thoughts on “That Thing About Being Mixed

  1. Awesome post! I never thought about the emotional struggles that people of mixed race face. I can see how it could be tormenting to not be able to embrace or even acknowledge both sides of your family. I assumed that mixed races were treated better than those of us with darker skin and kinky hair…


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