Culture

I’m single because…

To all the lovely, single ladies out there: aren’t you so tired of people asking why you’re single and then having to face an array of questions and awkwardly attempt to come up with some reasons for them?

Here’s a list of perfect responses to help you sort that problem right out. Always remember  that you don’t need to be attached to someone else for you to be worth something.

  1. I’d rather have a significant income than a significant other.
  2. “You see how picky I am about my shoes, and they only go on my feet.”
  3. I still haven’t met a man who is as good as ribs.
  4. Single is the new black.
  5. Once I tried flirting like “do you like bread…”
  6. We have bigger problems than worrying about relationships, like why they stopped making holey moleys???
  7. Will Smith is taken.
  8. I can’t commit to a dinner reservation, and you’re talking about a human being bro.
  9. The love of my life is a fictional character.
  10. Because I like being happy
  11. I already have too many dishes to wash
  12. Men run in fear once they’re exposed to the size of my appetite
  13. I see dead people *stare*
  14. Name one married superhero. Exactly.
  15. Because I want my turtle to grow up in a stable environment.
  16. When a Christian friend asks that question: Jesus was single. Would you be bugging him?
  17. Because the other side of my bed is filled with books, a laptop and a ton of things to do.
  18. That’s classified information.
  19. Sent an application form to the bachelor, waiting for a response.
  20. Waiting. He has three years left in prison.
  21. I don’t like sharing my food.
  22. Because a relationship status doesn’t go with my brand image.
  23. Because UberEats delivers some hot stuff straight home. Who needs more?
  24. Like most of socks, I am just single
  25. Overslept on my wedding day and missed the date.
  26. Depends who’s asking.
  27. It gives my grandma something to live for.
  28. Because he took out a restraining order
  29. Because I’m independently owned and operated.
  30. When I asked Siri that question, it activated front camera.
  31. Because when someone compliments me I get awkward, say happy birthday and walk into a wall.

Have fun and let us know if any of them works to get people off your back.


Written by: Safiyyah Sujee CA(SA), #MyGirlSquad, Bi-weekly writer

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